


Forever Home

by iforgetlikeanelephant



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Happy Ending, I wouldn't consider this full angst though, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-15
Updated: 2013-01-15
Packaged: 2017-11-25 16:00:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/640570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iforgetlikeanelephant/pseuds/iforgetlikeanelephant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“He's not mine, you know, and he never was. I was never under the illusion, even for a moment, that any part of him belonged to me,” Eleanor says finally, her fingers tucking a piece of hair behind her ear as she studies Harry's profile, his gaze locked firmly on his lap. “His voice belongs to the world, his body belongs to your stylists, his mind belongs to you four other boys and his heart is split up between his mum, his sisters, and…and <em>you</em>,” she continues letting her gaze flit around the flat to the pop cans littering the floor around the couch and the plates stacked haphazardly on the table from Harry's lunch before she looks at the younger male again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forever Home

**Author's Note:**

> This originally started as a sad!Harry drabble but somehow it evolved into this story which…I'm absolutely pleased with. I didn't demonize Eleanor and, in fact, made her human (and lesbian…oops), so if that somehow bothers you turn back now. Also, if there are any spelling/capitalization/punctuation errors just know that most of this was written sometime between midnight and 4 am.

It's not that he's some stray, he was never a stray really, his mother loves him, his sister loves him and the whole _world_ loves him. It's just that when Louis asked him to move in with him while they were on the x factor he thought that maybe, _just maybe_ , living with Louis would be his own little version of a _forever home_ that the animal rights places are always going on about. It was great at first, him and Louis living together, they'd camp out in the living room until the early hours of the morning munching on cupcakes that Harry just _needed_ to bake and Louis would share the bottle of wine that Gemma got him as a house warming gift even though Harry wasn't technically old enough to drink any of it legally. But once the whole _boy band_ thing really swung into motion their days were spent going from one interview to another and their nights were bleary eyed stumbles through their flat, a barely mumbled _goodnight_ shared between the two before they collapse into their own beds, exhausted beyond belief. 

It was crazy and whirlwind and if anyone had told Harry a year before that this is what he'd be doing now, touring the country (the continent, _the world_ ) with three of his best mates and…Louis, the man that knows him better than he knows himself, a man that reminds him when his own sister's birthday is but completely blanks on what part of the world they are in because of how busy their schedules are, he'd have had them locked up before they could finish their thought. Harry almost can't remember a time where the boys weren't in his life. it feels like if he looks back he can remember lazy summer nights hanging out with Liam in the grass of his backyard, groaning about the start of term, and going to crazy start of term parties with Niall and Zayn that the older (and cooler) Louis Tomlinson hosts. Of course he know that's not true, he knows that they've only known each other for two years but they're in and out of each other's pockets so much that it feels like no one else could possibly know him better. 

Which is why when Louis starts pulling away from him it's immediately noticeable. actually, that's not exactly true, Louis started pulling away during the BTR tour in the states but Harry only noticed it when they finally got home and the first free night Louis decided to go out with Zayn instead of staying home to build a blanket fort, watch shitty reality shows, and gorge on sweets. He should have noticed something was different, before, but he was stuck in his own head chasing thoughts of _forever_ and _mine_ that he could never voice about the man that was sleeping in the next bed/room/bunk over from. He should have noticed that Louis' eyes looked dimmer and that he was getting pulled into more and more one-on-one meetings/phone calls/conversational asides with their management team even as he was pulling himself away from the boy with too-green eyes and too-loud laugh. Maybe if Harry had been paying attention Eleanor wouldn't have come as such a surprise. 

Eleanor, Harry thought she was lovely…when he thought that Louis and her were friends, now that Louis' suddenly introducing her to the other lads as his _girlfriend_ he doesn't like her nearly as much. Harry can't help that he glares at her when Louis has her over for dinner in their shared flat and he even sleeps with a pair of earplugs in _just in case_ ; he's never actually heard Louis and that– _tramp_ –have sex and he really wants to keep it that way (if he didn't sleep with earplugs in though the only thing he'd hear, if he were awake enough, would be murmured conversations and the quiet _snick_ of Louis' bedroom door closing as he snuck out to sleep on his own couch so that his not-so girlfriend could sleep comfortably. _Alone._ ). 

Harry just never thought that Louis would get a girlfriend because he assumed he made himself pretty obvious when it came to his love for the other boy. And yeah, okay, he knew that Louis was dating Hannah when they were on the x factor but he always thought that that was more of a friend thing than anything else because almost everyone that they met during x factor just assumed that Louis was gay and yes, maybe he was a bit more flamboyant that your average 18 year old boy but now Harry feels like he shouldn't have automatically _assumed_ that Louis was gay because apparently it was always meant to just end in heart break. Thinking back, Harry realizes that he never actually _asked_ the older boy about his sexuality, it was a kind of taboo topic in their house, something he dreams about going back and changing as he's curled up as small as his lanky limbs will let him be while he's buried under the covers and blocking out all sound with his ear plugs. dreaming about Louis confiding in him that he's gay but, not only that, he's in love with him and that he wants to be his forever love. 

He cries about it, sometimes, he's man enough to admit it but child enough that every time he does it he's huddled on the steam warmed tile of his shower hiding his tears in the hot water and sniffling as he towels off. Harry's never liked to complain about things he can't change and he's never liked to talk about people behind their back so when he calls Gemma to complain about Eleanor he feels horrid but he can't stop the vile things he says about her while he knows she and _Louis_ are out on a date that's bound to end up all over the webpages of gossip rags the world round. He's happy that his sister doesn't try to tell him that it'll get better, she just shushes him as he dry sobs and says she's _so sorry bub,_ and _I wish there was something I could do to make it hurt less_ while his face is tucked into his pillow and his phone is clenched tightly in his hand. 

It's only been a few months but it feels like years, it feels like Harry's been watching the Eleanor and Louis show for nearly as long as he's seen the Liam and Danielle show which is both disheartening and makes him feel awful because Danielle makes Liam sososo _happy_ but Louis never has crinkles by his eyes when he's with Eleanor and Harry loves _LiamandDanielle_ (both together and separate) but loathes _LouisandEleanor_ but loves Louis and finds Eleanor a wonderful person to be around (or at least he thought she was before she became half of _LouisandEleanor_ and made him cry in his hot showers and over the phone to his older sister). He's curled up on the couch when there's a knock on the flat door and Harry's got the television up too loud to be able to pretend he's not home and Louis _actually_ isn't home so he shuffles over to the door and opens it, sucking in a shocked little breath when he sees it's Eleanor and he mumbles a quiet “ _Lou's not here_ ” which should be enough to send her on her way but she nudges her ways past Harry and sets her purse on the little table by the door before she turns around.

“I know he's not, and that's why I am,” she says just as quietly, smiling almost sadly at Harry as he closes the door and beckons her further into the flat with a nod of his head (and yeah, okay, he's having a bad day because _LouisandEleanor_ went out the night before and their pictures have been all over twitter/tumblr/ _the world_ so he's had a few good cries and even his hair's wilting due to all of the hot water it's been under in the past few hours) following her into the sitting room where _Lady and the Tramp_ is paused on the television and waiting until she sits in the armchair just next to the couch before he himself curls up on the opposite end of the couch from where she's still looking at him, biting her lip quietly. “He's not mine, you know, and he never was. I was never under the illusion, even for a moment, that any part of him belonged to me,” Eleanor says finally, her fingers tucking a piece of hair behind her ear as she studies Harry's profile, his gaze locked firmly on his lap. “His voice belongs to the world, his body belongs to your stylists, his mind belongs to you four other boys and his heart is split up between his mom, his sisters, and…and _you_ ,” she continues letting her gaze flit around the flat to the pop cans littering the floor around the couch and the plates stacked haphazardly on the table from Harry's lunch before she looks at the younger male again. 

Harry feels his heart flutter and something like victory blossom in his chest when he hears Eleanor's words, finally letting himself look at the admittedly pretty girl sitting in the armchair, her legs tucked under her bum and her fingers twisting in her lap before he speaks. “He's not mine either, you know, I've never had him…not even for a second. Not even when I though I did,” he chokes out, jaw clenching as he bites his cheek because he can feel the tears and he refuses to cry in front of the woman who's caused them. 

“Silly boy,” Eleanor sighs shaking her head at the younger male sadly, “you had him even when you didn't know you did. He's been your's as long as you've been his but both of you are too stupid to realize…I thought, at first, that you were already together and that's why he asked me to go out, I thought he wanted a beard just because you two weren't ready to face the world with your relationship. I agreed, thinking that I would just have to hold his hand on outings and listen to him talk about your relationship, a _real_ relationship, but I ended up having to listen to broken hearted ramblings because his best friend, and the boy he loved, had suddenly stopped talking to him when I was introduced as his girlfriend. I had to hold him while he cried and then went to sleep on his _own couch_ because I had to stay over to make our relationship believable to everyone. I thought that you were going to be in on the joke but instead you were somehow made the butt of it and Louis didn't even realize it, he didn't notice that you were stewing away in your own pain because he struggled with his own.” Eleanor's leaning forward at this point, tears in her own eyes as she watches the realization dawn on Harry's face, watches as he take in everything she's just said and processes it. 

“Why're you telling me all of this?” Harry questions, eyes wide as he searches Eleanor's face and sees nothing but truth, “Why _now_?” His hands are shaking and he can't seem to catch his breath as Eleanor unfolds herself from the armchair and eases herself onto the couch, her hand resting delicately on his knee as she gives it a friendly squeeze. 

Eleanor moves her hands into her own lap and turns sideways on the couch as Harry does the same so that they're sitting face-to-face, the closest they've been since Louis started introducing her as _his girlfriend._ “Because,” she starts with a tiny smile, “I'm breaking up with him; I've met someone that I really like and I want to give dating her a shot. But to do that I have to break up with him publicly and I felt that you should be the first to know.” 

“ _Her_?” Harry questions, his voice small, “You're…I didn't know that you were gay, but why should I know first? What right do I have to know before you've even done it?” His hands are still shaking and his throat has gone dry as Eleanor touches his wrist lightly.

“You deserved to know because you've been through more pain than I or Louis can imagine since this whole thing started, so you deserve to begin healing first,” she says, her voice light and her gaze locked with Harry's as his eyes fill with tears and he raises a hand to scrub harshly at his face, wiping the tears away with an annoyed huff because even if she is being kind he's still refusing to cry in front of _her._

“I still don't understand,” Harry admits carefully after taking in a few deep breaths, “Why say _anything,_ why not just let me think you fell apart naturally and that he's genuinely broken up about it?”

Eleanor looks at the younger male carefully and shakes her head slightly in disbelief when she realizes his confusion is genuine. “Because, Harry, it's difficult to spend so much time around someone that loves _you_ so fully and completely without me feeling like I've been half in love with you this whole time too. Louis cares so deeply for you and I know you feel the same and so if you thought for a second that he was torn up about the break up you'd hate me more than you already do and you and he'd both be miserable and I really don't want you to hate me more than you already do,” she admits, “So I'm telling you how Louis feels for purely selfish reasons, of course.” 

Harry cracks a small smile at her admission and ducks his head, “I didn't hate you at the start of all this, you know? I thought you were great until he started introducing you as _his girlfriend_ and then I felt like I missed something, like I had been tossed headfirst into the ocean and I didn't know how to swim. I hated you, but I think I hated myself more simply because I had never managed to tell Louis how I felt and then suddenly that wasn't even an option. I wanted to tell everyone how I felt yet I couldn't even whisper it to myself in the dead of the night without feeling like shit because I wanted him but you had him and he didn't seem like he minded at all.”

“I may have been half in love with you by sheer proximity but Louis is head over heels, just so you know,” Eleanor says quietly and with a hint of finality as she stands up and straightens her skirt over her thighs. “And I think you are too, so when he comes home tonight and tells you that I broke things off act surprised or don't, that's up to you, but _please_ tell him what you've told me because I really want you two to be happy,” she continues, walking to the door looking over her shoulder as Harry follows her steps, managing to open the door for Eleanor (like a gentleman), “You both deserve it.”

“I will, I swear,” Harry says swallowing around the lump in his throat, “And uh, let me know how it goes with the girl? I really…I didn't want to hate you so I'd really like to get to know you as Louis' friend if that's alright?”

“Of course, Harry,” Eleanor says with a smile, “That'd be great.” She grabs her purse off of the hall table and turns, brushing a quick kiss on Harry's cheek, “ _talk to him,_ ” she stresses before backing out of the door and leaving Harry standing, amused, in the doorway of his flat. 

So now Harry's in a state, rushing around the flat and cleaning every surface that needs it while running different conversation starters through his head, mouthing some of them, saying others out loud and wrinkling his nose at the worst ones before he collapses back onto the sofa and calls Gemma in a full blown panic. He somehow manages to tell her the whole story without any tears and ends his babbling with, “…so _please_ , I don't know what to say, I need your help!”An hour later he's no less confused than he was but he's at least not panicking as he hangs up the phone and heads into the kitchen to make himself some toast, the only thing he's convinced that he'll be able to keep down because of the nerves. 

He's just finished his toast and is flipping through the television channels, looking for something to distract from the knot of nerves that has settled somewhere between his stomach and his throat, when the flat door opens and Louis walks in, shoulders slumped and dragging his feet. “ _Lou,_ ” Harry chokes out, causing the older male to jump and his eyes to widen when he spots Harry sitting on the couch, “welcome home.”

“Harry,” Louis says, voice tired as he shuffles into the sitting room, toeing his shoes off before he gets to the carpet. “I'm not…I'm not really in the mood to talk right now,” he finishes as he lowers himself into the same armchair that Eleanor vacated only hours prior. 

“I know,” Harry mumbles out, after a few minutes of them both staring at the television blankly. “I mean, I know about Eleanor, the break up and everything, she came by earlier to talk to me. I just…I don't understand why you lied to me,” he continues, tilting his head to look at Louis and taking in the deer in the headlights look that's painting his face. 

Louis chokes on his tongue, coughing behind his hand before he responds, “I didn't mean to lie to you it just–it just sort of happened, one minute El and I being friends was enough for management and the next I'm being pulled into more meetings than I can count on two hands and they want us to start dating. I didn't want that, I _never_ wanted that, but I didn't have a choice really. But it worked, in a twisted way, because El and I both were hiding from things we didn't want to acknowledge and hiding together seemed easier than hiding separately. What…what _exactly_ did Eleanor tell you?” Louis jumped out of the armchair about halfway through his explanation and began pacing, stopping in front of Harry as he asks him what Eleanor told him, his arms hanging loosely at his side. 

Harry stands up, careful to not touch Louis as he stops in front of him, and answers, “She, uhm, she told me enough that I know–I _hope_ – what I'm about to do won'r get me punched,” before he leans down and presses his lips to Louis', one hand raising to cup the shorter boy's cheek gently before he pulls back. Louis opens his mouth to speak but Harry gets there first, “I love you; I've loved you since we met in that stupid bathroom and I was so nervous I thought I was going to puke all over your shoes and I haven't stopped. I've hated Eleanor for taking you away from me but mostly I've hated myself for letting you slip thorough my fingers when I was so certain that I would have you forever. Eleanor came to the flat today while you were out to tell me that she was going to break up with you publicly because she wants us to both be happy and she knew I was miserable and honestly, I hadn't thought she noticed–I didn't think _anyone_ had noticed really. She told me…she told me that you love me too, and that you were just as miserable.” Harry's lightheaded and flushed from his confession but he can practically _feel_ the pressure leave his shoulders as the words leave his mouth and Louis' eyes widen. 

“I–I was miserable, she didn't lie,” Louis says slowly, biting his bottom lip and letting out a slow breath, a shaking hand reaching out to wrap loosely around Harry's wrist. “I love you too; I mean, I know that's not as moving as your confession but I _do_ feel the same and–” Louis stops with a short gasp as Harry leans down and kisses him again, harder this time and searching before Louis surges up, arms wrapping around Harry's shoulders and lips moving against the taller male's. 

“ _I love you, I love you, I love you,_ ” Harry mumbles as he pulls away to catch his breath, lips brushing against Louis' with every word. “Why didn't you ever say anything? Why let me think you were dating Eleanor?” he questions, letting his thumb rest against Louis' bottom lip as he speaks before moving his hand to cup the back of Louis' neck and tug the shorter male into a tight hug. 

Louis breathes in deeply and presses his mouth to the center of Harry's chest through his shirt. “Because I figured if you didn't love me back than at least that way you'd have a chance to move on to find someone that you really did love without me getting in the way. I wanted you to be with me, sure, but I'll always want you to be happy, and I was just counting on those two things not coinciding,” he answers, voice muffled as his hands wrap tightly around Harry's hips and Harry sighs, carding his fingers through Louis' hair. 

“I'll always be happy with you, Lou. _Always._ You're my forever,” Harry admits, cheeks flushing red as Louis pulls out of the hug to look him in the eye, Louis' grip on Harry's hips almost tight enough to bruise. 

Louis grins, bright and happy, before reaching up and thumbing across Harry's dimple, going up on his tiptoes to press his lips to Harry's gently before responding, “You're my forever too; you're the love of my life and my home when we're oceans away from England. I'm just sorry I waited this long to tell you.”

“Well, I know now, and that's what matters,” Harry grins back at the older male as he tugs gently on the ends of Louis' hair before resting his hand lightly at the nape of his neck. “Now let's stop being mushy and cuddle on the couch, please? We can even watch Grease if you want, Zuko,” he continues, pulling away from Louis completely to grab his hand and tug him to the couch. 

“Love you,” Louis mumbles quietly as they push each other around in an attempt to get comfortable, Louis ending up draped across Harry's chest, their hips cradled together and his nose pressing against Harry's collarbone as he reaches for the remote and finds the recording of Grease that they have saved on their DVR. 

“Love you too,” Harry says happily, resting one hand on the small of Louis' back while slotting together the fingers of his free hand with that of Louis', cheeks aching from how hard he's been grinning the past few minutes.

**Author's Note:**

> Abrupt ending is abrupt, that's what I get for stopping my plot bunny in an effort to sleep :/


End file.
